The Good Aloha

Dear Hawaii,

I always look forward to being in the audience when someone from your fine state addresses the crowd. I have even said to the people sitting next to me, “I hope that guy is from Hawaii. I feel a monster 'aloha' in me that needs to come out!” I am not sure if you are aware of this but the same scenario plays out at every one of these events. Here is a transcript:

Speaker:   Now, where I come from we always start off with a big 'alooooo-haa!' and I am going to need all of you to say aloha back, okay? Alooooooo-haaaa!

Crowd:   Alooooooo-haaa!

Speaker:   Hmm... Now, I know you can do better than that. I want to hear a really big aloha out of each and every one of you... Alooooooo-haaa!

Crowd:   ALOOOOOOOO-HAAAA!!!

Speaker:   Now that was a good aloha.

After the greeting has been deemed satisfactory, the speech or pep rally or whatever it is, goes on as usual. I think that you should consider occasionally accepting the first aloha. Let me explain; If the crowd knows that their first aloha is going to be disqualified immediately, they are not going to try as hard. They are going to save their good aloha for the second try. I think you could inadvertently, be setting yourself up for some lame first alohas.

Just sayin'

Jake